Romance is an expresion of tenderness that spices your relationship in ways that reminds your partner that they are cherished, loved and wanted.
Why the focus on men regarding this topic? Well, the answer is simple. Women are naturally more emotional and relational unlike men who are more logical and so we see things differently.
People argue that romance is something that the westerners introduced through Hollywood movies, Telemundo series, romance books and magazines try to make us believe is essential in any relationship/marriage.
Could it be that men don’t value romance at all? Or maybe they don’t understand the concept of romance especially our Nigerian men.
Nelly’s Diary decided to take this discussion open so we don’t crucify our Nigerian men without hearing them out.
Nelly’s Diary- Do you think Nigerian men are romantic?
Melody-Well, I don’t know about most Nigerian men; I can only speak for myself. I know I am romantic, in fact ladies tell me this. I don’t even know when I do whatever they consider romantic because I think that’s just the best thing to do. I noticed that whenever I offer to help ladies like helping carrying an extra bag or open the door, they all go awwwhh, that’s so romantic. I believe being romantic could be more than those little gestures with the woman you are dating.
Ibrahim- Nigerian men are. Let me talk for myself. I’m the kind of man that can be a psycho for a woman if I’m in love. Psycho in the sense that the TLC she gets is mind-blowing. You can never hear any lady refer to me as romantic because I think I should rather reserve that for my woman.
Chinelo- Sincerely, I think most of our Nigerian men are not romantic. I have had discussions with some of my male friends and colleagues that have given this insight. I wouldn’t blame these men. They didn’t grow up in such environment where the father expresses his love physically to his wife, holds her hands in public or display any form of PDA. In short PDA is like a taboo here and it seems to attract so much attention. So when we ladies complain about our guys not being romantic, they don’t seem to understand what we are talking about. As far as an average Nigerian man is concerned, once he can provide for you, he is romantic enough.
Debby- Most men make the mistake of stop being romantic immediately they start dating the woman or after marriage. This is a no, no. This is when you should even be more creative in keeping the fire burning in the relationship.
Oyiza- Being romantic can be in any form. It could be the way you call her name, generosity, attentiveness and even courtsey. Women are very relational beings and little things can be seen as romantic to them; like how you look at her, how you touch or hold her, even a warm embrace is romantic to her.
Mrs. Aby- Most Nigerian men find it hard being romantic. They think it always has to be about the money. Something little as sending a sweet text, complimenting how she looks, holding her hand while talking to her is the magic your relationship needs.
Pius- Maybe you should ask Nigerian women what being romantic is. Many of them don’t care about little sweet things like stroking her hair, giving her a hug for no reason or helping her carry her bags or even holding the door open for her. The only romance they understand is money, expensive dates and the latest iPhones until then, an average Nigerian man is not romantic. I am talking from experience.
Tunde- I think Nigerian men are romantic but are afraid of showing it. They feel that they may be considered weak by other men left even the woman that they are dating or married to, so they look for other ways to express it.
Engr.Okey- I believe being romantic means that no matter how busy you are, you should always make out time for her, to show her that you are there for her even though she can take care of herself but you still choose to care for her in your own way. So I can say Nigerian men are romantic especially our generation unless the women want something else, then they should tell us what being romantic is to them.
Richard- I don’t think anyone is born romantic. You can learn to be romantic. If a man is considered to be unromantic, that means he refused to learn and take practical steps. We forget that little things like these are enough to spice a relationship or marriage.
Princely- I am romantic. I can tell you a bunch of things I have done. There was one time my girlfriend was hyped about Valentine’s Day and I was indifferent. This got to her because she was really looking forward to it. This wasn’t our first Valentine together but she had plans. That day she wasn’t expecting anything from me because I had already told her that I would be very busy at work and besides it’s just a day! Unknown to her, I had given her roommate 14 hand written love letters with content for each day starting from the 1st of February down to the 14th day, with a note for the 14th telling her how every day with her is a Valentine’s Day. Each of the letters were enveloped and dated. This action made her know that I was crazy about Valentine with her all along. I also got her a sexy lingerie alongside the letters. Her friends kept reading the love letters to her everyday for weeks. So yes, I think Nigerian men are romantic.
What do you think? You can join the discussion in the comment section.
With Valentine’s Day just some few hours away, you can show just how romantic you are.
P.S: Ladies, this is not applicable to just the men alone. Your man deserves a Valentine’s Day treat too.
If you are single like I am, you too deserve a Valentine’s Day treat yourself.